Q & A: How Do You Build Non-Physical Intimacy?
Q: How do you build non-physical intimacy in a relationship?
A: The simple answer is to stop or limit your physical intimacy. Many times we can lean on physical intimacy because we do not feel comfortable in our emotional or spiritual intimacy. By limiting our physical contact, we are then forced to learn how to connect in new ways. Building an emotional and spiritual connection is just like exercising a muscle – it takes time, practice and growth. Some specific examples for becoming closer emotionally and spiritually would be: connecting each day (there is always something we can share, and the more we do the more natural it will feel), processing through emotions and conflict together, talking about dreams – both literal and metaphoric, taking turns planning dates for one another, having fun together that doesn’t involve just being physically intimate, pray with one another, talk about your relationship with God, the list really is endless… Because we can choose to enter into physical intimacy from “Day 1” of knowing someone, it can create a false sense of intimacy when entered into prematurely. We can get the rush of emotions and feelings that come from being close to a person physically and yet not knowing them at all on an emotional level. If jumping into the physical early is a pattern, I would recommend waiting and letting your other forms of connection build before entering into physical intimacy. It is important to know whether or not you connect on multiple levels or if your physical intimacy is carrying the load of all your connection. Physical intimacy never will be able to make up for a lack of emotional and spiritual connection
by Brendon Byrne